what accent?

Taking photos of these "boys" (as Elly referred to them).....


was worth this....

...I think. Ya'll, my poor car didn't have a chance.

summertime

Chalk on the sidewalk. Bubbles in the air. Crisp, fresh margaritas in my glass. Grilled fish tacos on my plate. Dinner on the patio. Sunscreen on my skin. Pigtails in their hair. Scrapes on their knees. Glow sticks in the night.

Summer 2009 is in full swing at our house.

weekend away

Just after Alex and I married, I started training for a marathon and Alex got into cycling. We laugh now about the progression of his bikes when we were in Chicago. He started out with a cheap girlie bike that might as well have had a pink basket attached to the front. (It didn't, but the basket wouldn't have looked out of place.) Then there was a mountain bike. Then into road bikes. When we moved to North Carolina, he joined up with a riding group. And then he was asked to ride for a team. I was pregnant with Elly and Alex didn't feel he could devote the time to training and commit to the amount of travel necessary to compete. Now he doesn't get on his bike nearly as much as he would like, but we still support cycling.

So...this weekend we made our way to Greenville, South Carolina for the USA Pro Cycling Championships. Superstars in the world of cycling show up for this race. I won't bore you with all of my photographs, but here is just one of cycling celebrity George Hincapie.
It was also nice just to have a weekend away...without the girls. In the car on the way down I got a call from my doctor confirming that the blood work I had done last week showed there is a medical reason why I have been so tired lately. (No...I am not pregnant.) So I used the diagnosis as an excuse to spend most of the weekend in bed. But I did manage to get out of bed for a few mojitos, dinner with Alex at a lovely Indian restaurant, shopping around Greenville, cheering for riders, and hanging out with my brother-in-law and his girlfriend.

And if I'm going for full disclosure here...I skipped the 5K race in order to sleep in. But I did run later in the day on the treadmill in the hotel fitness center. That counts, right?!

trip tidbits

* Fun times in the car with the girls. Sisters playing together in the backseat. Sharing Twizzlers for the first time. The three of us "singing" La Bohème at the top of our lungs (apparently my girls are big opera fans). Answering Canon's many questions such as, "Mommy, what is a soul?"

* Canon has a bladder of steel. She can hold "it" for days....unless we are on a road trip....and in the middle of nowhere. Drama always ensues. This trip was no exception.

* After a harrowing experience northbound over the Chesapeake Bay Bridge, I arranged for a police escort on the return trip. When I arrived at the bridge I was very early and desperately missing the girls, so I decided to brave it myself. I'm proud of myself for making it over, but very disturbed that this debilitating fear has basically popped up out of nowhere.

* Hours alone in the car to listen to podcasts of This American Life and Fresh Air.

* Finally getting to see my sister's and best friend's new homes.

* A few hours in New York City.

* Discovering New Jersey trains and buses turn into pumpkins at midnight.

* My first trip to the beach this year with the girls, thanks to my sister and brother-in-law.

* I was really glad my girls got a chance to spend some quality time with their aunt and uncle, but now I'm feeling guilty for dumping the girls with my poor pregnant sister for two full days.

* On the way home the girls and I stopped at a Cracker Barrel for dinner. We had so much fun. I love being with those two little people.

* Short but sweet time with my sister, brother-in-law and best friend.

momentum

Alex and I spent the weekend in Greenville, South Carolina. The USA Cycling Pro Championship was the reason for our trip, but we didn't actually see much of the race. It was still really cool to be in such a cycling-friendly environment. Athletes everywhere. Beautiful road bikes being led through the hotel lobby, standing vertically in the elevator and propped in hotel rooms. It made me sad for Alex that he wasn't a part of all that this year. He was asked to be on a team just after we found out I was pregnant with Elly. He decided he couldn't devote the time to training with a new baby on the way. Turning down the team slot drained his desire to ride. I'm hoping this trip gave him the momentum to get back on his bike.

With no children in tow, we indulged in the things only child-free people can do. Enjoying a beer and conversation at lunch. Wandering around the city, stopping wherever we wanted. Ducking in a open-air bar and waiting out a rainstorm. Having sex in the afternoon. Dining outdoors with friends. Drinking and laughing at a sports bar. Sleeping in. Getting back in bed for no reason.

It was wonderful. I definitely missed the girls. But missing them was a good thing; I'm back refreshed.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It appears my mom survived her first weekend with both of my girls. She more than survived; it sounds like the three of them had a wonderful time together. She even had enough leftover momentum to take me to a concert Sunday night. She had been given tickets in a suite box to see Josh Groban. I wanted to go just to be with my mom, but I loved the show. To be honest....I was pretty moved by the performance.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Summer officially ended today with the close of the pool. Canon didn't let this opportunity go to waste. I did the math and she swam the length of two football fields. Talk about momentum. The girl could not be stopped.

full of surprises

This weekend my sister and her husband made a surprise visit home. We had a wonderful time. Canon especially loved playing with her aunt and uncle.

Friday morning I was still stumbling around in a sleepy fog when I heard someone on my front porch. I opened the door to find Lauren, Paul and my mother working in my yard. And they worked hard. I feel so incredibly loved. I would show you a picture of the yard, but without a "before" photo it wouldn't be that impressive. Instead...here's what they removed from my tiny front yard.

All their hard work inspired me. It also made me realize that I need to be more productive. I need to better use the time I have when the girls are sleeping.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Last night Alex and I were in the kitchen talking. I guess we are always generally aware of the scurrying at our knees and scooting by our feet. We happened to look down just in time to see Elly crawl by. She was crawling. Not the lift and lunge scooting she has been doing, but a knee in front of knee crawl. And just like that...she can crawl. I have a feeling much of their lives will go by just as casually. Alex and I will just be looking around in sheer wonder as our girls grow up.

And with flicks of the wrist, she can also wave bye-bye.

weekend fun

You know any weekend that starts like this...
is bound to end up like this...
And we finally got around to celebrating Canon's birthday in Georgia. My girl loves Chuck E. Cheese. She saw the backstage door crack open and she was there, ready to give him a big hug and a few high fives. He sat down at our table and played with her dinosaurs. She was in heaven.
And now Canon's 3rd birthday has officially passed.

weekend...whew!

It's actually been a pretty crazy week. Lots of running around. Lots of time with my family. Most days I would pack for the day, and the girls and I wouldn't get home until late at night. But family time always feels good.

And this picture just makes me happy. My grandfather loves my girls so much.


Today Alex and Canon went out for breakfast together and then saw Ratatouille. I'm so glad they are spending time alone. Their outing also gave me some one-on-one time with Elly. She is everywhere these days.

I've been busy, but I've also felt very uninspired lately.

awakening

This weekend we were in Georgia for a family event. When we are at the in-law's house, there is rarely time to head to Atlanta. This weekend we made time. I knew I needed it. Saturday morning Alex and I got up early, made sure the girls were squared away with Nana and Big Papa, and got a city fix.

We started off with breakfast at Java Jive. It had been nearly nine years since we were there last, but nothing had changed. Retro decor, an eclectic group of diners, and gingerbread waffles with homemade lemon curd. We reminisced about the meals we had shared there during our dating days.

It was still very early when we finished breakfast, so we took a car tour of all our favorite spots. So many memories, so many stories to retell, so much laughter, so much fun. Then we headed to the museum.

During my very first visit to Atlanta with him, we saw the Picasso exhibit at the High Museum. It was my sophomore year of college, and we had only been dating a few months. We flew to Atlanta, rented a car and spent the day in the city before heading to his parent's house. The High was our last stop before leaving Atlanta. We were the final group to be let into the museum before it closed. We walked through the museum hand in hand, gazing in awe at Picasso's artwork that hung just inches from our eyes. It was ridiculously romantic.

This weekend we made our way back to the High for the Annie Leibovitz exhibit. (I've been staring at my computer for quite a while trying to write something about our time there. I think I'm too emotionally attached to the experience to choose words to describe it right now. So, let me just say...it was incredible. I feel inspired and creatively recharged. My spirit is awake.)

We had an emotional and exciting conversation over lunch. It's time to think about moving.

my trip, my stories

I wrote quite a bit while I was away. I dated everything and intended to back post, but now that I'm home, I've decided against it. I began the trip depressed. I wasn't exactly sure why. Things got better as the week went by. Much better after Alex arrived.

I promised pictures, but Canon was impossible. At the beach she runs. Constantly. When I pull out my camera, she runs faster. It was actually easier to take a picture of her footprint in the sand just a breath before the ocean erased it, than to get a picture of her face.


Canon's expression of verbal affection has become almost obsessive. One day on the beach I decided to count how many times she said "I love you, Mommy" during a one hour period. I lost count at 52. It was during that time we also had this conversation.

Canon: I love my seashell.

Me: You do?

Canon: Yes...I love you too, Mommy.

Me: I love you.

Canon: I know you love me, Mommy.

Take that, seashell! I don't think it gets much better than that.


I did manage to get pictures of Elly. She thinks sand is yummy and hilarious.


On the way back from the beach, we visited my grandmother. She is 90 and can barely see. So I was surprised when she said...

"A few weeks ago I saw rednecks coming through the doors and windows."

Apparently her medication combination was causing her to hallucinate. She is better now; no more rednecks coming in the windows. We asked her how she knew they were rednecks and she said that she could just tell.

Anyway...it's good to be home.

today

Sometimes the things in life that bring me the most joy feel like weights tying me down. So heavy. To move, I must drag each along. Today my weights seemed unmovable.

The plan for today was to spend the day on the lake with some friends, my brother-in-law and his girlfriend. Alex and I were the only married couple...and the only ones with children. I spent all of my time taking care of the girls or seeking shade with Elly. I finally packed up the girls and left.

Plans for the rest of the weekend changed. People who had planned to spend time with my family opted for the single atmosphere.

I feel isolated and lonely. The girls are tucked in their beds and I just want to walk out the front door and run. Run until I'm too tired to run anymore. And then just lie down and sleep. But the weights that make me want to run also keep me here.

weekend

We spent a wonderful weekend in Georgia with Alex's family. It was so nice just to be together with absolutely no plans. My body is sore and my skin is tan from hours and hours of playing outside.

Usually I'm not a big fan of posed pictures, but I love this one. It was taken after a long day of running, jumping, bug hunting, throwing, sweating, laughing, wrestling, joking, eating and bubble blowing, but no one cared how they looked (or smelled). Everyone was genuinely happy to be together.

how it all began

Last week I had so much fun hanging out with my friends, I neglected to prepare for my trip to Wilmington for my sister's graduation. So...Friday was a flurry of activity. In an attempt to help me, Alex came home early and took Canon for a few hours. Somewhere along the way, he hurt his foot in the same place he had broken it a few years back. He was completely out of commission, leaving me to take care of the girls, cook for the trip and pack alone.

The next morning, Alex went to the hospital and the girls and I headed to the beach. We were in the middle of nowhere when Canon said she needed to go potty. At about the same time, Elly got hungry. There was NOTHING for 30 minutes and Canon was begging for a bathroom, so I finally pulled over on the side of the road. I tried to make peeing on the ground seem fun and exciting, but Canon wasn't having it. "Me no can pee-pee on the ground," she said. We tried for several minutes with no luck. I let her get back in the car and gave her a snack while I nursed Elly. Though she could not pee-pee on the ground, she had no problem doing it in the car. I finished nursing Elly, changed Canon's clothes and our urine soaked car finally arrived at the beach house my mom rented.

The house was beautiful and just steps from the beach. My sister Lauren and I were in charge of a graduation party for about 17 people. We arrived at the house with only a few hours to prepare. The air conditioner was broken. It was fixed just as guests began arriving for the party. But by then, Lauren and I were dripping with sweat from cooking in the extremely hot kitchen. We took the girls to the beach to cool off and decompress.

Ahh....much better. The rest of the weekend was wonderful. More on that later. Here's a picture of my mom and my little sister who is all grown up now.

get a room

My mom graciously offered to babysit today so Alex and I could celebrate our five year wedding anniversary. (We weren't able to celebrate last month because of the stomach bug.) Her timing was perfect; Spiderman 3 came out this weekend. In our younger, pre-children years, we would have been at the midnight showing Thursday night, but at least we made it opening weekend.

Being in a movie theater reminds me of my life before I became a parent. Even the popcorn smell takes me back to younger years, snuggling next to Alex and being swept into another world. Now I'm older, my perspective has changed. It's difficult to watch a movie and not be completely aware of the process...the directing, the acting, the lighting, the casting. But still...it was fun.

The best part of the evening came as we were watching the credits. When the lights came up, I was shocked to see how many young children were in the theater. We were surrounded by children as young as age three or four. Even though Spiderman is make-believe, it has some serious violence. As the credits rolled, an older couple in one of the front rows were talking closely and kissing. A mother sitting next to us shouted meanly, "Get a room! There are kids in here." Alex and I looked at each other in disbelief. Two adults showing affection...totally inappropriate. Young man dying after being stabbed twice in the chest...perfect entertainment for young children. Unbelievable.

weekend

Canon and Crawly were inseparable for a solid hour. She loved him. Once I didn't see him so I asked where he went. She turned around, and there was Crawly clinging to her neck. They did everything together. They played with Elly, took a tour of the yard, supervised me as I worked, looked for the frog, and tickled each other. Canon found a stick for him to hang on. He dangled from the end while she searched the yard for more bugs. Once when she ran through the grass, Crawly lost his grip. Her heart broke and tears streamed down her face. We looked for Crawly, but he had gone back to find his mommy and daddy. I was sad for her, but so envious of the cares of a child.

We found the frog, by the way.

backtracking

friday

early start. hours in the car. good conversation. hugs. fun at the park. vomit in my hair. snuggling under heavy blankets. red snapper burritos. late night conversations.

saturday

lazy day. spring snow. crazy kids.
indoor egg hunts.
homemade pizza. card games.

sunday

early risers. church. delicious lunch. dyed eggs. outdoor egg hunts. hugs goodbye. hours in the car. home again.

weekend

It's getting more and more difficult to take a pure picture of Canon. She is aware of the camera as soon as the lens cap comes off. She puts on her best fake smile. Speaking of camera, I need to get my favorite lens cleaned. Until then, updated pictures of the girls might be few.

We spent an uneventful weekend at home. A trip to Target, dinner at Moe's, silly dances around the house, another hula hoop lesson, attempts at holding a handstand, doing just about anything to get Elly to laugh, so many hugs and kisses.