things

We bought a fire pit last weekend. The girls want to know why we can't "camp" every night.

"Camping" has led to an obsession with marshmallows. Elly arranged two hundred of them all over the floor this morning.

My freelance job is almost over. I am nauseous with stress.

There is peanut butter smeared on over half of our piano keys.

Mt. Laundry is about to overtake my bedroom.

Feeling guilty that I can only be frustrated with the girls while I am trying to work.

Feeling guilty for dumping the girls off on unsuspecting family members.

Ate a box of donut holes for dinner. Followed by a midnight snack of potato salad and chips and salsa. Stress makes me crave carbs...apparently.

Looking forward to getting passed this, getting back to my old self and getting excited about Christmas.

hair accessories

I have this new headband that I love. And I wear it with this dress, which I also love. But truth be told, Alex has no love for the headband. At a recent cocktail party he spent quite a bit of time positioning us so that the flower of my headband faced the wall. And of course, I spent as much time as possible drawing attention to the headband by petting it and crazily casting my eyes toward it. So I'm curious, dear blog-world friends, what would you do? He hates it. I like it. Do I continue to wear it when I'm with him?

And I am a little curious what you think of the headband. It's like this one, but grey...and um, with spots. Be honest. I can take it.

A very stylish and beautiful woman at the cocktail party told me she liked my flower. I was all "THANK YOU! My husband has been making fun of it all night." She asked me why. I told her I didn't know; he just doesn't like my headband. She recoiled almost in horror and replied, "Oh! Well..you can't even tell it's a headband." Like....it was fine when it was just a spotted flower on your head, but a headband...EGADS!

little things

Just rain on a leaf, but it made me happy. Happy Wednesday.

hugs and handshakes

This time each year I am temporarily inducted into a semi-exclusive boys' club. Nearly everyone I deal with for my freelance job is involved with college or professional football. I guess you probably wouldn't be shocked if I told you that the football industry is dominated by men. And for this specific job I am the only woman. I can tell my presence forces an aggravated sense of politeness and restraint. Also...there is no way to slip in the back and pretend to be one of the guys. Flashing arrows and blinking lights that spell "woman" hover over my head. Like the time I had to take my two-year-old to a meeting I absolutely could not miss. Six men in suits and me and Elly at a conference table.

So I guess it shouldn't have been too much of a surprise when I started being singled out in one way or another. But I am still a little surprised by the vehicle....hugs. That's right. When all the men give greeting and parting handshakes, I get hugs. And I'm not even a huggy person. I'm not sure how this happened, but now it seems to be the standard. And really there is no going back without confrontation. I have tried extending my hand, but it is sort of laughed at and trumped with extended arms. Ugh. And I'm not really sure what all the hugging means. Except I am different. And all I really want is freakin' handshake.

the farm

Lately I've been lusting for an old farm house. With cold, creaky wooden floors and a screen door that slams shut with a startling bang. Curtains that partner with passing breezes for friendly dances. The view from the kitchen window of fields and trees and an old red barn. Pastures that are blanketed with fog in the morning and painted gold by the sunset in the evening. Fireflies that chase the dusk and deer that stalk the dawn. Endless places for the girls to explore. Fields of grass and dirt and flowers and weeds and bugs and critters that can transform on a whim to pirate ship or alien planet or fairy garden. Endless acres where there are no rules. A secret place behind a tree that is quiet and all my own; a place everyone knows exists, but no one knows exactly where it is.

And somehow this dream doesn't compromise my desire to live in a city. It's the extremes I love, the middle where I am discontent.

early morning autumn sun

I followed A Year of Mornings before it became a book. And that is where I really fell in love with diptychs. They catch my eye everywhere.

that's fall

A little yellow leaf sailed to a soft landing right in front of my feet. I think Mother Earth was sending me a personal announcement of Fall's arrival. Thank you, Mother; I've been waiting.

greatest invention

Super scientific proof that the flat iron is the greatest invention ever.

Seriously...what in the world did I do before I had a hair straightening device?!?

working

The girls are at school. I'm at home working. In sweatpants. With a cup of coffee. Tzeitel at my feet. Bua's piano man behind me. If I Had a Hammer on repeat. Working from home ain't so bad.

what accent?

Taking photos of these "boys" (as Elly referred to them).....


was worth this....

...I think. Ya'll, my poor car didn't have a chance.

lately I've been...

...working. Since everyone around here seems to be having first days, I thought I would share that yesterday was my first day, too! I threw on a dress and went to a meeting, which officially kicked off my freelance job. And I've got to say - mentally, I was totally unprepared. If someone in the meeting had accidentally wet their pants, or spilled a drink, or hit someone else...I would have been on it. But production schedules and scripts and grown-up words are somewhere in the mushy, rarely used part of my brain. I guess it's time to dust them off again.

....listening to Grizzly Bear. And getting excited about new albums from the Avett Brothers and Phish.

....reading South of Broad. I spent the summer reading books written by my former college writing instructor Sarah Dessen. Okay, I'll admit it...I love reading young adult novels, but Conroy is a nice segue back into more mature reading material.

....watching Mad Men. I love when my entertainment is art. The only downside is - the quality of this show has ruined all other television programming for me.

...enjoying the time I get to spend with my girls. I'm looking forward to having three days with them. Hope you all have a wonderful holiday weekend.

because this isn't just a "mommy" blog...

...here's a picture of our backyard spider. Whew! I feel better now.

summer is yummy

Seriously...I cannot stop eating blackberries. Pints of them seem to just disappear. And has fresh lime juice always tasted so good on EVERYTHING?! Summer is delicious.

And it's also a good time for reading. I'm excited to read this book which is written by one of my mom's former students (full disclosure: she is thanked in the acknowledgments). I'm also excited that Pat Conroy finally has a new book coming out. And the girls love their new book, which is illustrated by Alex's old pal (and hula seventy's husband).

So I'm curious, what are you reading....and eating this summer?

colon cleansing

Made from lemons bought for a five day cleanse (which I abandoned halfway through the first day.) I think pie is a much better choice anyway.

Ummm...yeah. That's sad. I have no self-control.

thieves

When I saw the mustaches in the store, I knew thievery would be involved. I just couldn't resist (shamelessly) stealing this idea. Of course we didn't have a professional photographer on hand and instead relied on my handy-dandy tripod, but we still managed to have fun. Try it! You are guaranteed to have a good time.

down dog

Today in yoga I spent a few extra minutes at the beginning of class focusing on my breathing and calming my mind. Then I moved into downward facing dog, made sure my body was in the correct position, looked through my legs and that's when I found myself face to face with a sleepy-eyed golden retriever. I hadn't noticed her until our eyes met because she was lying there so quietly. She didn't move the entire class. From the moment I saw her, I completely lost focus of my yoga practice. Every time I tried to clear my mind, I found myself envisioning what the room would be like if I brought my dog to class. I figured there would be lots of leg humping, face licking, running around and general craziness before she would tire out and fall asleep.

I found out later that the golden retriever is just a puppy and a guide dog in training. It's just fascinating what dogs are capable of doing and the relationship humans have with them. I definitely feel we did Tzeitel a disservice by not training her well. I just hope we aren't making similar mistakes with our children.

hollywood

Since it is Oscar night, I thought it would be a perfect time to tell you about my yearly splurge. I rarely ever buy magazines, but ever since college I have bought the Vanity Fair Hollywood Edition. When I lived in New York and Chicago, I could get my hands on a copy of the magazine before the photographs were leaked on the internet. And really, many of the photographs are stunning. Not to mention...Annie Liebovitz has photographed every cover (as well as many and sometimes all of the photographs in the spread). It's total eye candy and I look forward to it every year.

in my head

My current musical addiction is this song. I've seen the movie a couple times and I can't get it out of my head. If you have seen the movie, what did you think?

smell the cow manure

I've decided to slow down. Take more time to stop, look around, appreciate the world around me. You know...smell the roses. Or in this case, make a u-turn on my road trip and photograph cows. Hey, cows, thanks for giving me a reason to stop.

snowflake surprise

As I was packing last night, I walked past a window and saw beautiful, fluffy snowflakes falling from the sky. Usually in the South there are red flag alerts everywhere warning of potential snowfall, no matter how slight the chance. I guess I've been in my own world because this one took me completely by surprise. It was nice.

Watching the snow fall peacefully in the night reminded me of a time in New York. It had just started to snow when I left work and headed underground for a subway ride to my acting class. When I reemerged on 8th Avenue I found that the snow had fallen quickly. Everything was white. The grime and dirt of the city were hidden beneath a blanket of snow. And that part of the city was completely silent. No cars or cabs. Almost no people. No sounds except the crunching of fresh snow beneath my feet. Even then I realized this was my New York moment. The one special moment that will forever stand out in my memory. The time I felt like I was the only person in a peaceful and beautiful Manhattan winter wonderland.