This time each year I am temporarily inducted into a semi-exclusive boys' club. Nearly everyone I deal with for my freelance job is involved with college or professional football. I guess you probably wouldn't be shocked if I told you that the football industry is dominated by men. And for this specific job I am the only woman. I can tell my presence forces an aggravated sense of politeness and restraint. Also...there is no way to slip in the back and pretend to be one of the guys. Flashing arrows and blinking lights that spell "woman" hover over my head. Like the time I had to take my two-year-old to a meeting I absolutely could not miss. Six men in suits and me and Elly at a conference table.
So I guess it shouldn't have been too much of a surprise when I started being singled out in one way or another. But I am still a little surprised by the vehicle....hugs. That's right. When all the men give greeting and parting handshakes, I get hugs. And I'm not even a huggy person. I'm not sure how this happened, but now it seems to be the standard. And really there is no going back without confrontation. I have tried extending my hand, but it is sort of laughed at and trumped with extended arms. Ugh. And I'm not really sure what all the hugging means. Except I am different. And all I really want is freakin' handshake.
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7 comments:
Well, "they" (whoever that is) say you need eight hugs a day to be emotionally stable. If nothing else, maybe you'll feel a bit more grounded emotionally at these meetings. One thing for sure, it definitely could be a lot worse.
THAT'S ANNOYING!!!
And you have a really good handshake... for a girl.
i agree, it's annoying. i am not very huggy either because i don't like going chest to chest with everyone. but you can't go back... once a hug, always a hug.
julie
hilarious! i'd much rather do a handshake with guys I don't know than a hug too!
it's your yoga body :)
I'm going to sound and feel like a grade A jackass here, but I'm being truthful. A handshake with a woman is awkward. We're taught that you judge a man by his handshake, but nobody ever said what to do if a woman wants to shake your hand. I shook my boss's hand after my review a few days ago and she gave me this limp worthless handshake...that didn't do anything to make me want to do it again. You strike me as a good shaker. Maybe try and cut them off next time by getting your hand out there before they can open their arms. From now on I'll be more aware of how I'm acting when it's time to shake a woman's hand.
Thanks for commenting, Possum. Your point is well-taken.
Handshakes were a big deal to my mom. I'm pretty sure there was even some handshake practice going on at my house back in the day.
So I tend to forget that a lot of women don't communicate strongly/positively with their handshakes.
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